Tuesday, June 9th 2015
It is one week since Freya died and we are slowly getting used to life without her.
Reflexes remain, such as when, in a pause between other activities, I think to go and look where Freya is. Or when I notice the time and think I had better give Freya her dinner. The other afternoon I dozed off on the bed and awoke with a start from a muddled dream thinking “Now Freya’s back, we must make a fuss of her”.
I still haven’t disposed of the carrying cage and its contents but I will do so eventually. From what I know of myself, I expect to wake up one morning thinking “Today’s the day to do that” and then I will…
We of course insured Freya for medical expenses and, like all insurance premiums, those for Freya have increased year on year. Her final claim has not yet been settled but when it has, the monthly premiums will no longer be required. We have both decided to donate an equivalent amount of money to one of the cat charities.
I have not yet made a final choice for my share but I think I will sponsor a cat at one of the rehoming charities. When cats are rescued, every effort is made to find a good home for them but for some this is not possible. They may be too old or may suffer health problems that most people are unwilling to take on. In other cases, the cat is traumatised and needs long-term, possibly permanent, care, or may have behavioural problems that render him unsuitable for rehoming in a domestic environment. These cats remain for the rest of their lives in one of the cat sanctuaries. Maintaining these cats is a labour of love but it also costs money, and most charities run sponsorship schemes whereby you can make a regular monthly donation for the care and support of a named individual cat and receive regular reports on his welfare. Some charities even allow you to visit your protégé.
I am of course aware that such sponsorship is virtual rather than actual. Some cats are more likely to attract sponsors than others and I cannot imagine a cat charity feeding one cat on turkey breast and putting another on half rations because he has not received a sponsorship. I don’t doubt that all income is in fact shared out as it is needed. That’s as it should be and I’m happy for my money to be used democratically, as it were. Seeing donations as a sponsorship, though, allows you to become involved with an individual and to feel some caring and responsibility for him.
I have tentatively picked out a charity and a cat I would like to sponsor, but that may change between now and the money being freed up. I am aware that in the aftermath of a loss such as that of Freya, one’s thinking and reflexes are not what they would be in more stable conditions. Decisions can be made hastily that one regrets afterwards. The wait for the insurance claim to be settled gives me time to reflect and, all being well, make sure I am thinking sensibly again.